Taxi Driver

Uhm. Not my usual kind of entry, but I need to rant if I want to get some sleep tonight.

I may have met someone.
I went out with Arm & Lu, took a taxy back home and now I have the driver's number. He was good looking. He sounded nice.

Trouble is:

a) I'm ridiculously shy. The idea of going out with someone who's a complete stranger, even for a simple coffee, completely weirds me out. He was nice, but it didn't sound as if we have much in common. On the other hand it was a ten minutes chat, in a taxi. The only way to get to know him is to give ot a try. *slams head against nearest wall*

b) I'm pants at flirting. I didn't realise he was coming on to me until he gave me his number and said "give me a call if you want to go out for a beer or something".

c) I have the self-esteem of an unemployed house-elf, so I'll sooner think someone wants to rob/kidnapp me than go out with me. This sure was a nice ego boost, but I keep asking myself "where's the catch?".

d) I have trust issues the size of JKR's bank account. This means that I tend get defensive and give not exactlly thrutful answers to strangers who ask me too many questions while I'm locked in their car at 11.30 pm in front of the central station (needless to say, one of the most unsafe areas in town). Don't look at me like that, I didn't say I was a secret agent or an alien. I just aged myself a bit, said that I worked -it sounds a bit less "look at me, I'm easy pray!" than 23, university student.
Paranoia is just another world for longevity, right?
Remenber points B & C, I couldn't think of a reason for this guy to be asking so many personal questions. He could have been a crazy stalker! He still could be one! *has a mild panick attack* How the fuck I'm going to explain that? "Sorry, I thought you were a serial killer" doesn't sound good.

e) I've always worked in a strange way: when I meet someone -friends, theachers, colleagues- either I immediately click with them or I know I'm going to be awkward and uneasy around them for at least a couple of years. It's instict, and I know first impressions are often wrong but it has always sarved me well. I've never been let down by a friend, or backstabbed by someone who was on my good guys list.
There was no click.

f) I'm a 23 years old, eternally single (and now you know why), neurotic girl. I'll probably kick myself for the next two years if I don't give it a try. Hell, I can see myself - a seventy years old lady with fifty cats who spends her days watching bad soap operas and asking herself "what if..."!

Yes, this is what goes on in my mind. My secret is out, I'm certifiably insane.
Now I'll go hug my pillow and sleep for 10 hours staigh.

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